Words of kindness that our poor hearts crave. Please don't keep them, hidden away.

Lately I have lost sight of who I am.  It’s easy to get lost and turned around in a world like ours.  I was categorically kicked when I was down; I feel like I am 30 feet under water, and kicking my way to the surface. I’ve forgotten where I’ve been, and how far I’ve come. I may not be the strongest person yet, but I am getting there.  I have undergone a huge change in myself these past few years.  I had to learn lessons the hard way because I was too stubborn to listen to anyone else.  I learned that I can’t just manipulate, and walk all over people to what I get what I want.  Chris once told me that I’m a clever girl who knows exactly what I want, and how to get it.  Maybe that’s true but I got to a point in my life where I was ashamed of who I was, and knew a metamorphosis was necessary to redeem myself in this life.

I realized that I didn’t want to be remembered as the girl everyone was jealous of because she had it all; I want to be remembered as the girl that would stop what she was doing to run to the aid of broken friend.  I want to be remembered as the girl who never spoke negatively about anyone.  The bottom line is, I want to be a good person.  I no longer wanted to inflict pain on others in the selfish pursuit of my own happiness or satisfaction. I’ve learned true happiness comes from a sense of peace and contentment, which I obtain by serving others, and opening my heart to all.

People who know me now are often shocked to find out about past mistakes, or don’t believe me when I tell them about my previous character-or lack thereof.  Those who have known me for a while however I still feel are cautious around me, and I fear they still see the old Margot.  I realize I cannot control the way people view me, I can only do my best to show them a girl who is unselfish, kind, and charitable.